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If I am missing or dead  Cover Image Book Book

If I am missing or dead / Janine Latus.

Summary:

In April 2002, Janine Latus's youngest sister, Amy, wrote a note and taped it to the inside of her desk drawers. Today Ron Ball and I are romantically involved, it read, but I fear I have placed myself at risk in a variety of ways. Based on her criminal past, writing this out just seems like the smart thing to do. If I am missing or dead this obviously has not protected me...Amy died in silent fear and pain. Haunted by this, Janine Latus turnd her journatlistic eye inward. How, she wondered, did two seemingly well-adjusted, successful women end up in strings of physically or emotionally abusive relationships with men? If I am Missing or Dead is a heart-wrenching journey of discovery as Janine Latus traces the roots of her own and her sister's victimization with unflinching candor.

Record details

  • ISBN: 9780743296533
  • ISBN: 0743296532 :
  • Physical Description: 309 p. ; 24 cm.
  • Publisher: New York : Simon & Schuster, 2007.

Content descriptions

Target Audience Note:
All Ages.
Subject: Latus, Janine, 1959-
Latus, Amy, 1965-
Murder victims > United States > Biography.
Abused women > United States > Biography.
Sisters > United States > Biography.

Available copies

  • 1 of 1 copy available at Headingley Municipal Library.

Holds

  • 0 current holds with 1 total copy.
Show Only Available Copies
Location Call Number / Copy Notes Barcode Shelving Location Holdable? Status Due Date
Headingley Municipal Library 362.8292092273 (Text) 36440000227450 Adult Nonfiction Volume hold Available -

More information


  • Booklist Reviews : Booklist Reviews 2007 July #1
    Having suffered through a childhood of rebellion against an abusive father and escaped to an uncertain early adulthood, Latus maintained contact with her family, particularly her younger sister, Amy. Whereas Janine was thin and obsessed with her appearance, Amy was overweight. Both were in abusive relationships, each giving a highly edited version of her life to her sister. Janine painfully records the slow erosion in her own self-image—too eager to please men, even going so far as to have breast implants—while she chronicles Amy's struggle with weight, divorce from an alcoholic, and eventual enrollment in college. Janine explores her own self-justification for taking abuse from her husband, citing his devotion, passion, and attempts to keep the marriage together. All the time, she recognizes the looks of her stepchildren—the cringing against imminent explosions—as feelings she and her siblings had had growing up with a volatile and abusive father. When Amy is murdered by yet another unsuitable man, Janine confronts the cost that women pay for pretending that all is well. A heartbreaking look at domestic violence. Copyright 2007 Booklist Reviews.
  • Kirkus Reviews : Kirkus Reviews 2007 March #1
    Journalist Latus's straight-shooting memoir about dutiful Catholic sisters growing up in 1970s Michigan dilates into a haunting story of abuse at the hands of the men in their lives.In 2002, the author picked up the phone to learn that her younger sister was missing and the prime suspect was Amy's freeloading ex-con boyfriend. In the ensuing chapters about the sisters' childhood and youth, Latus attempts to figure what went wrong in the relationships both women endured with the men they loved. Clues begin to center around their father, an insurance salesman who is both seductive and hypercritical. On the one hand, when Janine is a girl, he routinely tells her how flat-chested she is, what a stupid laugh she has. On the other, he "feels her up" with his eyes and praises her sexy legs. Her mother remains passive while the girls' Catholic religious teaching hammers home the message that women are seductresses and men have uncontrollable urges. Obviously, the only way for someone as pathetic as Janine to get men's approval is by sleeping with them; she grows into a rebellious, fairly promiscuous, academic dilettante. Janine graduates and marries her lover (after he gets a divorce). Stuck at home, much younger Amy marries early, gains weight and lets her education languish. But she eventually gets a divorce, builds a career as a pricing analyst and starts over. Then she meets a dangerous, two-timing criminal who's obviously bad news—but he keeps telling Amy he loves her. Just as the author finds the courage to turn around her life, Amy dies. And Dad's still clueless, telling suggestive stories about his daughter at the memorial service. Latus writes here to save the lives of women like her sister and herself, so desperate for love that they'll pay any price for it.An honest, unsparing look at the deadly erosion of self-worth.Agent: Katherine Boyle/LitWest Group LLC. First printing of 100,000 Copyright Kirkus 2007 Kirkus/BPI Communications. All rights reserved.
  • Library Journal Reviews : LJ Reviews 2006 November #2
    Drawing on a piece that won an Essay of the Year award from the American Society of Journalists and Authors, Latus chronicles the murder of her sister by an abusive lover and her own narrow escape from the same fate. Copyright 2006 Reed Business Information.
  • Publishers Weekly Reviews : PW Reviews 2007 February #4

    At age 37, Janine Latus's younger sister, Amy, was strangled to death by her live-in boyfriend, bundled in a plastic tarp and buried beside a remote country road. It was a wretched end to a too-short life, one frequently marked by disappointment, sadness and struggle. In the hands of a less gifted writer, Amy's story might stand only as an encomium or a cautionary tale: a glimpse into the life of one abused woman, representative of thousands like it. But Latus weaves a double strand. Part memoir, part biography, the book (which grew out of an article in O Magazine ) explores Latus's own relationships with abusive men—and her eventual emancipation from a marriage riven by emotional and physical violence. Latus has a spare, economical style, softened by an undercurrent of humor and marked by a total absence of self-pity. When on a ski vacation, a boyfriend brutally beats her, breaking several of her ribs and her nose—and then makes love to her, in a twisted form of penance—Latus doesn't wince in the retelling. She lets ambiguities and contradictions abide: she loved her husband, even as he humiliated and hurt her. Had things been slightly different, she seems to say, she—and not Amy—might have perished at the hands of her partner. Unforgettable, unsentimental and profoundly affecting, Latus's book resonates long after the final page is turned. (May)

    [Page 69]. Copyright 2007 Reed Business Information.

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